Butt...

It has been a busy day here in office-land! Perhaps a longer post will come later tonight, but for now, I will leave you, faithful reader, with this short story:

As I was walking to work this morning, I passed a group of "thugs" sitting on the benches alongside the park. As I walked by, one of these fine young gentlemen said, "Oh sh*t, she has a hell of a butt!" Now, this young man said this quite loud, as I was blasting my ipod and still heard him. Isn't that swell of him? Boys are great. But who says "butt" anyway? I mean, when the lovely BF and his scumbag friends talk about girls, they are at least obscene enough to say ass.

Ironically, while this all was going on, I was listening to MY HUMPS.

Back to work!

Apparently, I’m a Barbie girl.

Long weekend recap time!

Friday:
Got out of work early (woohoo) and then James and I walked 900 miles to find a new restaurant for dinner. We both sucked at life and were indecisive and cranky (ok, I was cranky) so we ended up at the quasi-gross pizza place. We then got wine and watched Desperation (kind of lame) in the sweltering heat of our apartment.

Saturday:
Went to Murda’s house and did laundry for days. Got obnoxiously sunburnt in about 45 minutes, which was totally awesome. We then proceeded to Will and Kristen’s. The night was filled with watching boys play poker and some stupid ultimate fighting crap. The fun level here was super high, let me tell you.

Sunday:
We ventured to the Queens mall for the first time. We both sucked at life (again) and didn’t buy anything. I then got ditched by James for Atlantic City. Awesome. So in protest, I ate ice cream and watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. And played lots of Kingdom Hearts 2. Obviously my coolness was just oozing out of me at this point.

Monday:
James got home at 7:45 in the morning. He slept for about 30 seconds and then we went to the park so him and Murda could pretend they were young and in shape and good at basketball. I read magazines in the shade (highlight of the weekend). Then we went to Murda’s house and ate and complained about how hot it was.

So on Sunday, while we were walking down our street from the subway, we passed a group of Spanish girls sitting on their stoop. They were probably 15-17. When we walked by, one of them starting singing “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world!” At first, I’m like, no, they were not just making fun of me! But then James said, I think you just got made fun of! I am the most un-Barbie Girl ever. Seriously. Barbie was tall. And tan. And skinny. I am none of these. I was highly insulted. Don’t these children know they must respect their elders!? God. I am still insulted.

Celebrity Sightings: 1

So after over a month, I have finally had my first celebrity sighting. This morning, I checked Gawker Stalker (like always) and saw that Tobey Maguire was in the area. So at lunch, I went on a little stalking mission. And what did I find? Spiderman 3 being filmed across the street from my job! How fun. I watched them film a scene with a little kid dressed up like Spiderman hanging upside down from a rope. And then, Mr. Tobey was spotted hanging out with the directors or whoever. He def looked right at me (or maybe the screaming Asian tourist girls next to me). Then I walked to a different stalking spot and watched him "audition" some model/extras. They were all about a foot taller than him (Spiderman is a bit on the short side) and they were doing their best catwalk walks (on sand). Overall, a fun lunch break.

The greatest sentence a girl will ever hear...

...if you want to take off a little early (4:30-5pm ish) then feel free.

<3 the boss man today!

Marriott sucks.

So earlier this week, I had, what I thought, was the GREATEST IDEA EVER. The GIE was this: James has 137,000 Marriot points from his many trips to the Philippines. Instead of going on the fabulous free trip we had planned, we would have our imaginary wedding at a Marriott and use the points to pay for some of it! Brilliant, right? 130,000 points is enough for SEVEN nights at Category 6 hotel (the highest is 7). The figures out to be around $2200 if you paid in cash. So today I emailed Marriott, just to see if you could use points for something other than a room. They quickly responded saying, why yes you can! Here is what available:

$250 Certificate to Use Towards Meeting Cost = 50,000 points
$500 Certificate to Use Towards Meeting Cost = 100,000 points

Un-freaking-believable. I am so annoyed.

Thursday Afternoon Rant

Random things that piss me off:

• Being the shortest person in all of Manhattan (along with the slowest walker and the palest)
• Random drips of "water" that fall from various places above me
  
• My apartment being dirty 24/7 (Note: this does not piss me off enough to actually do anything about it. It just annoys me enough to complain.)
• Getting a 25% raise by moving here and having LESS money than I did in DC
• My hair and its unableness to look nice
• Not getting a seat on the subway in the morning (this REALLY makes me mad, I feel like if I have to suffer out in Queens, I should AT LEAST be allowed to sit my fat ass down on my 9 hour commute.)
• Waking up and going to a job every morning (3 years in the workforce is enough, right?)
• These bullets in my list that won't show up in IE and I am too lazy to figure out why
• Being a "web designer"
• That if I eat ice cream every day, I WILL get fat
• My lack of celebrity sightings after over a month of stalking on my lunch hour
  

And finally, the number 1 thing that pisses me of....

• TODAY IS THURSDAY, NOT FRIDAY.
  

I <3 Carrie Bradshaw

I saw a woman on the subway this morning. WITH A FREAKING SCHRUNCHY. Seriously, are there really people out there who do not take what Carrie Bradshaw says as the gospel?

(Sidebar: last nigh on the WB was the episode where Samantha and HotHeManBoy shave their heads. Favorite scene of all time. Well, maybe second to when Carrie farts in bed with Big. That was classic.)

Dinner and Trailers.

Last night, James, Murda, Cathy, Melissa, and myself went out for Thai food in Forest Hills. This was my first time eating Thai food AND my first time to Forest Hills. Loved them both. So much, that today I looked up houses there and, get this, THEY ARE QUASI-AFFORDABLE. Like, James and I could maybe someday buy something there. And by something, I mean a condo, not a house. Anyway, dinner was lovely. With the exception of something that has been plaguing me for years now. It seems that whenever I am out to dinner with more than one other person, my dinner either comes out 5-10 minutes later than the rest OR is completely forgotten about. I would say this happens 75% of the time. For example, last night, there were 5 of us. The order consisted of 3 appetizers, 5 entrees, 1 bottle of wine, 1 soda, and water. Simple, right? I even ordered first. We even saw the waitress write the order down. But no. My Drunken Noodles were forgotten about. Now, since this has been happening to me for about 10 years now, I have come accustomed to it. It doesn't even bother me that much anymore. But it makes the rest of the people at your table feel awkward and, in most cases, makes the waiter/waitress feel bad too (which they should, but I still feel badly.) Why does this happen to me all the time?! I can't remember the last time I went somewhere and it was someone else's meal that was forgotten. So bizarre. The only bonus was we got a free dessert. Which is always nice.

Today, on my daily lunch hour walk, I had my first quasi-celebrity sighting. Ok, not really, but I saw some trailers on 7th Ave that had names on them (Cora and Chris). There was no filming anywhere to be seen, but I was still excited. So of course I will go stalk some more tomorrow. Although I imdb-ed the name Cora and nothing exciting or relevant came up.

Smack the ditz out of her.

Weekend Recap:

Friday:

• James met me after work and we hung out and shopped until the bus arrived
• We saw Courtney and Sima for about 5 seconds, then we took the train back to Quizeens
• Ate at what I thought was a Mexican restaurant that turned out to be Spanish and that shakes every time the subway goes by

Saturday:

• First stop on the Whirlwind NYC Tour: WTC site
• Second stop: Statue of Liberty
• Apparently, James and Alaina are NOT the only people in the world who haven't already seen Lady Liberty. The line was monstrous so we decided to not waste the time. And the water was super rough so instead of getting seasick, we sat on a bench and watched the boat hit the pier.
• Third stop: Canal Street/Chinatown/Little Italy
• Necklaces were bought, paninis and gelato were eaten, silver converse sneakers were stalked
• JAMES BOUGHT CARGO SHORTS
• Fourth stop: TOP OF THE ROCK
• Amazing. Totally work the $19.
• After walking 9 million miles, went home, ate, pre-gamed, and Marc joined the fun
  
• Went to Saloon and they played awesome music

Sunday:

• Ate a waffle sundae for breakfast (diet and gym starts today!)
• Walked in the rain
  
• Said goodbye
  
• Napppppppppppped

So that is the weekend in a nutshell. I think I'm becoming a fabulous tour guide.

Apparently, I was wrong.

http://www.fox.com/programming/returning/oc.htm

That totally rained on my Marissa-in-a-coma parade. Oh well. But if they EVEN have Kaitlin start dating Ryan, I might just throw up.

I only watch TV shows with 2-letter names

So last night was the season finales of the OC and ER. Since the BF has no desire to hear my thoughts, I will entertain the ever-attentive internet.

OC:
I don't know if its because I have been watching the DVDs but the show felt rushed last night. Maybe because I was in a rush, but still, it felt like they tried to fit 2 hours of stuff into 1 hour. I was not impressed with the ending but I have an idea of what they will do next season. Since they left it up in the air about Marissa being dead or not, I think she will be in a coma. That way, dumb Mischa can try to become a movie star and when she fails, she can wake up from the coma. This is a little bit of a reach, not as good as going to Europe to be with Dylan, but its possible. And if she is in a coma, it gives reason for my next thought. Summer will be so distraught that her BFF is near death, she wont go to Brown and go to fictional OCC (Orange County College (which may be related to CU, California University)). Seth will also stay because, duh, he doesn't have anything else to do. And of course Ryan will feel so guilty because if you think about it, its his fault this all happen to Marissa in the first place, so he wont go to Berklee. Now why, faithful reader, is this all Ryan's fault? Because if it wasn't for Ryan, Trey would have never met Marissa and tried to rape her. Then she would have never had to shoot him to protect Ryan. And then she would have never gotten kicked out of Harbor and had to go to Newport Union, which is where she met Johnny. If she had never met Johnny, she would have never met Volcheck and then Ryan would never had to beat the snot out of him for cheating on Marissa at the prom. And then Volcheck would never have ran Ryan's brand new but not really car off the road. So really, Ryan has to feel so guilty for not being a more aggressive driver and having the weight of the potential death of his sad little not-GF on his shoulder's for the rest of his life. I really hope next season is better than this past one. Season 1 and 2 were redonkulously better than season 3.

ER:
This show has been one of my favorites forever, despite the crazy things that happen on it that would never happen in real life (I mean, how many times does a man's arm get cut off by a helocopter and THEN a few month later, said man gets killed by a helocopter FALLING OUT OF THE SKY!?) Anyway, before the show, I was telling Alaina that I didn't think Abby (or Abs, best line of the whole show) would lose the baby because they already did the story line with Carter and that chicks baby (which might have been the saddest episode ever, not counting when Dr. Greene died because that will always be the saddest moment in all of ER history). Anyway, I really didn't think anything would happen to Abby/Kovac in this episode UNTIL he asked her to marry him. That totally gave it away.

Sidebar: WHY DID ABBY HAVE TO SAY THAT PANDAS WERE KIND OF CREEPY!?!?! Ugh.

Anyway, I hate cliffhangers like that. I hate having to wait an entire summer to find out what happens with Abby. I still think there is a chance she will have the baby, she's probably 7 or 8 months pregnant so in theory, she could still deliever. But I am no doctor. I think they may kill Sam off though. I think crazy Steve will do a murder/suicide thing with his fam.

I really would love for ER to be on TV for the rest of my life. I could careless if the storylines get even more rediculous, I just love it so much. Its quite possibly the most dramatic show I watch and its so good!

Tonight when Alaina gets here, we are going to watch the LAST EVER WILL AND GRACE. And I will cry like a baby. And love every second of it. I hope Leo says he wants nothing to do with the baby, I hate his character sooooooooooo much. But it has to have a happy ending, so Leo will probably move back to NYC and they will live in Will's apartment while he moves in with Vince to HARLEM (I loved the jokes he made about their soon to be neighbors last week).

Wow, is my life really that boring that all I can write about is TV?? Yikes!